Cholesterol

Cholesterol

Not trusting God will kill you. It's been making me sick this week. When we wrecked I said God saved us. When waiting for the insurance check I forgot how big God is. We had enough money to get to June but the wreck set us back financially. I tried to reason out how we could know the check would arrive in due time. All the major work had been done. That is, they had inspected it and told us what we'd receive. I tried to reason it out to make myself calm, but there was always another "what if?"

What if we weren't supposed to move to Nashville?
What if we somehow messed it up?
What if some check we forgot about cleared the bank?
What if it took months and months for them to issue us the check?
What if by some combination of these we met our financial demise...
And as a result had to move in with our parents?

Hence, the very reason that reason itself doesn't give peace. Hence, the need for faith.

I suppose any of these things could have happened. Worse things could have happened. But if they had God would have brought us through it. No doubt-I can say that now. That is, now that the check is in the mail. I should have said "no doubt" before. That would have shown faith.

Anyone can cheer for the winning team once the game is over. Why do I wait to praise God? Why do I act as though He has to prove Himself to me? That's dumb.

I hope one day I will learn. If I don't I'm bound to suffer a heart attack and die in my early thirties.