Monday, November 29, 2004

I'm Sorry For Not Writing

Hello. Goodbye.

Thursday, November 25, 2004

Before The Pilgrims

The people associated with To Whom It May Concern wish you and yours a Happy Thanksgiving. Enjoy some pumpkin pie. I did.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Bite The Bullet

Well, it's nearing noon and I'm still sitting in my apartment. I need to get on the road, but it's freaking storming. I don't really mind driving while raining, I just hate trying to pack up my car in the torrential downpour. I also have a headlight out and I need to change it, but again, it's raining. Last night, I couldn't fall asleep at all. I guess I was excited about driving home and seeing my folks. I think I finally went to sleep around 5 AM. Well, it's picking up again, so I'm going to go get a shower and eat something. Maybe it'll die out a little by then.

Peace

Sunday, November 21, 2004

Of All The Saints

This weekend has been filled with both misery and delight. Misery because I am still a little flu-ed. Delight because I haven't been at work.

Friday night, I saw my friend Crystal Kepler. She and I bumped into each other at Wal Mart. We stood and talked for 2 hours straight in the same spot. It was a nice reunion. Then, on Saturday morning, I was woken to a phone call from Sean Tanner. We also talked for a couple hours. That started the weekend off right.

I bought some movies used from Movie Gallery. I paid $30 and got Saved, A Mighty Wind, and Jersey Girl. I watched Saved again last night. It's mostly great.

Last night and today, I've been listing some of my possessions on the "suckas" mart. I listed my 12 Expositor's Commentary set and started it for $35 and put the buy now at $90. Sure enough, I woke up today and someone had already bought it. I was in shock. I am grateful.

Tonight, my goal is to write a letter and wash some dishes. We'll see, we'll see.

"The glove compartment is inaccurately named and everybody knows it. So I'm proposing a swift orderly change. 'Cause behind its door there's nothing to keep my fingers warm. And all I find are souvenirs from better times. Before the gleam of your taillights fading east to find yourself a better life." Death Cab For Cutie, Title And Registration, from Transatlanticism.

Friday, November 19, 2004

A Week Until Thankfulness

Oh, I am tired. My dishes are still piled up. My congestion is still lingering. But, one more day until two days off. Then, two more days, until four day off. It's nice to think about, but the days are long to get to the actual days off part.

It's quite annoying to be me sometimes. I aggravate myself. I want to just tell myself to shut up or something. How come the most bothersome things about myself are only noticed by me when other people are doing them?

These days are long and tiring; I cannot find peace.

I'm a lonely moon watcher.

All I'm looking for is some relief.

Sing on...

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

I Am Always The One Who Calls

I'm sick again. Bah! I have a cold, I think. I hate cold weather or at the least, when it changes from cool to freezing. I have to go to the doctor's today anyway for a physical, so maybe he will take sympathy on me and just write a prescription for antibiotics. My appointment is at 3:00 PM, so hopefully I'll have enough time to mail my grad school application off afterward. The physical is part of the application process. And I know what you're thinking, it's November, isn't that kind of late to be applying? Well, yes it is, but that's another great thing about seminary. I need to get a haircut today also. It's getting annoying. Also, I need to wash some dishes and laundry, and get some pictures developed. Sheesh. Why can't my days off just be filled with nothing? But, here's some good news. Because I was sick, I went to bed near 2:00 AM and got up at 10:30 AM. That hasn't happened in a few months.

Saturday, November 13, 2004

Inmate # 34K526ESL3

Has anyone seen Shrek 2 yet? If (at the theater or the newly released DVD) you watched the credits all the way through, you will have heard "As Lovers Go" by Dashboard Confessional. That was a nice touch, I thought. The soundtrack has some other stuff that is pretty good too.

Friday, November 12, 2004

Against Levitical Law

My day started normal
Like any other September
Things resembling the past
Eluding to allusions of the future
It was going fine
I had made plans for up until a quarter till nine
Along this day
Something got in my way
I wasn't looking for beauty
But, then all I saw was you
Everywhere I looked
All the time I stared
The biggest smile I've ever received
In my wildest dreams I couldn't have conceived
That it would be for me
Your storyteller eyes all bright and clear
A heart that I always want to be near
This seemed like ecstasy
Until my rapture of reality
An ironic, self-defeating moment
I missed the whole scene
Someone told me about it
A friend I trust indeed
How dumb am I?
I didn't even look at you
Something as precious as your face
And I let pride get in the way
Was that smile meant just for me?
I guess one day we shall see

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

I Was Never An Alter Boy

Sorry I haven't written anything since Saturday.

Yesterday, I bought two $1.00 lottery tickets while I was in town. I didn't win anything on one of them. On the other, I won $4.00. I was happy. But, here comes the addiction of gambling. I took that $4.00 card and paid one more dollar and got a $5.00 card. On that card, I won $10. That was nice. I didn't get anymore and I think I'll go get my money today. But, I was thinking... Too bad debt doesn't work like that. The more you spend with your credit cards and the more you get loans, the further in debt you get. But, with the lottery, you actually have a chance of winning. Debt would be so much more appealing if you would get something else out of it besides annoying phone calls, bills and a negative credit report. Sigh.

Saturday, November 06, 2004

Don't Worry, I'll Catch You

I'm impressed with University a whole lot!

Why do I do this to myself? Why oh why? Every night, I stay up so much past the time I should be down. But, I am off this weekend, so I will sleep plenty or just enjoy not working, whichever comes first. I actually wanted to stay up to go get a paper. I'd like to see if they published all the results from local and state elections. It would be nice to see if where I wrote myself in for the House of Representatives was published. Now, all the local people can see my name and thus the existence of my name will live on in infamy! But really, I just wanted to see my name in print.

I've been remaking some of my Christmas CD's tonight. I had a few before but they got jacked last September when my crib got broke into. I have four already and they contain some classic, newer, and weird covers of the Christmas holiday flavor. It's pretty much a tradition for me to make a new one each year. If I remember, I'll be sure to list my favorites tunes for the ultimate holiday CD compilation soon.

Most recently, I've been corresponding with my cousin who is incarcerated through postal mail. I enjoy it quite a bit. The dude was a big brother to me so when he got locked up, I was pretty upset. Well, now we just shoot the breeze. However, he's beginning to become more adamant about why he is not a believer. Which, for me, is fine because I can be just as vocal about why I am one. I just don't want to be like some of my relatives who write him. Though I am not a scholar, the upcoming weeks will be filled with apologetics and studying to refute some of his cliche philosophical arguments. This guy isn't going to be convinced that Jesus loves him until he sees the need to believe that Jesus actually is God himself.

You knew you weren't going to get a lot from me when you read seven posts within three days of each other, didn't you?

I'm really tired, but I feel the need to keep writing. I'm picking Chase up from work today and we're going to listen to some records. I've got a bunch I want to sell at a garage sale, so I'm going to try to figure out what I don't want. Regardless, Chase and I can pick apart anything together or pick an argument unintentionally with each other. Loads of fun is guaranteed for all.

I have this weird habit about needing to watch TV while I eat. It's so puzzling. I cannot [or will not] just eat my food without sitting on the internet, watching TV, or a movie. It's weird. I need help.

On with the last things. This is how unfocused my life has been spiritually for a while: Until the other day, I hadn't realized I had a certain anniversary last month. October 16, 2004, marks the 10th year I have been a verbally professing Christian (and with my heart too). Two weeks after that, ten years earlier, was when I was baptized. Okay, that's it. I suck, woo.

I'm sorry I'm so random.

"Our love for Thee is far too small
Who love another thing at all,
Unless from Thy pure hand we take
And love it for Thine own name's sake."
- St. Augustine

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Finally

Kerry concedes and Bush accepts!
I Am Not Michael Miller

In 2000, my dear pal Mike stayed up all night to watch the confusion during the election. Well, I'm not as enthusiastic as he was. I'm going to bed because it is late. Staying up isn't going to change one thing or another. I will be getting up at noon, and hopefully George W. Bush will be reelected President of the United States of America by then. If not, well, that will be another post. Nevertheless, I still gotta freakin' work tomorrow.

See you soon kids...
I Don't Really Wanna Be Up All Night

Well, I switched over to ABC and they have not counted Ohio for Bush like NBC did, so it's still 249 to 221, Bush ahead of Kerry. I knew this would be close like the 2000 election, but I don't wanna be up all night. Also, ABC annoys me when they address George Bush as mister and not president. I understand you have to use a variety of different terms with regard to titles to avoid repetition, but it seems demeaning to me to never call the actual president by his current title. Just a thought.

Sigh. We wait on.
Who Cares If I Wake The People Next Door!

I'm watching the political coverage on my local NBC affiliate.

Bush just won Ohio!!! I'm getting giddy. He has 269 electoral votes. He just needs one more state! Any state! Bah you liberals!

But, if Kerry wins everything, it would be 269 tied. Scary! If it is a tie, they go to a Jello wrestling match, otherwise known as the House of Representatives.

Let's keep watching...

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Normally An Independent, But Tonight, I Am A Republican

Bush just won Florida. I yelled out happily "Yes!!!" in my apartment a few minutes ago. I hope I don't make my neighbors mad. Maybe we'll keep the election coverage up here on To Whom, but it's not like people are reading this to see what actually happens.

I had a conversation with a girl last night. It's not that I didn't want to vote for Bush, but her attitude of, if you are a Christian you must for Bush, just bothers me. I know posting conversations has gotten me in trouble in the past, but I just wanted to share this. It is in context, but not all of it. Here is the conversation:

Girl: what are ud oing on here so late?
JeffyJeffW: looking up canidates and figureing out whom i am voting for
Girl: duh
Girl: BUSH
Girl: You're a christian right?
Girl: Bush is like me and you...vote for him.
JeffyJeffW: haha
JeffyJeffW: well, for the sake of arguing
JeffyJeffW: i'll say, i am a christian and if i thought kerry would be a better leader, i would vote for him
JeffyJeffW: but, i dont trust kerry, nor do i trust bush
JeffyJeffW: but i do think bush will do better than kerry
JeffyJeffW: kerry is a fool, his policies are asanine
Girl: Yeah but isn;t in common sense to want someone who shares the same values as you do? Doesn't it make sense to vote someone who is being led and guided by God?
Girl: Does that not make sense?
JeffyJeffW: again, it's politics
JeffyJeffW: i believe God is involved in politics as much as satan is involved
JeffyJeffW: bush is playing the conservative card
JeffyJeffW: i'm not saying he's not faithful
JeffyJeffW: but i doubt a lot
Girl: yeah, but he's a born again Christian. He isn't just playing the "religious card" like people are accusing him of. I heard a guy at church who met with President Bush and he said that Bush layed his hand over his shoulder and started praying for his mom who was dying in the hospital. He was basically saying that Bush is the real deal...not just a phony christian.
JeffyJeffW: yeah, but again
JeffyJeffW: did you see it
JeffyJeffW: i'm not saying he's lying
JeffyJeffW: but i just like to see what people do
JeffyJeffW: not just hear what they say
Girl: lol yeah but you're contradicting your own beliefs...you don't see God but you believe he's real. I have no reason not to believe this man. And I hear stories about Bush and his faith all the time. I mean I'm not saying the mans perfect...but I have peace about him being the President for another 4 years. I think God wants him to be. It'll take a mirical...but it worked 4 years ago.
JeffyJeffW: it isn't a contradiction
JeffyJeffW: comparing basis of bush and God aren't even in the same league
JeffyJeffW: God has evidence for his existance, which has been proven to me thorughout creation, the Bible, and man's testimony
Girl: I just think if you're a Christian then thats what you should look for in a President. He makes tough decisions. Without God's help...we're on our own
JeffyJeffW: see, i dont totally disagree
JeffyJeffW: however, i just think, we should vote for whoever is "the christian"
JeffyJeffW: and that's what a lot of christians tend to push
JeffyJeffW: i'm not saying you are, it just sounds similar to that argument
Girl: true. But..Kerry goes against everything God stands for in the bible and Bush stands up for everything God says in the bible. I just don't see why thats so hard to see
JeffyJeffW: that's not true
JeffyJeffW: he's not even wholly against abortion
JeffyJeffW: kerry could be, as christian as bush
JeffyJeffW: he's catholic
JeffyJeffW: that's up to God
Girl: it's not? Kerry is for abortion and all that. He is as far to the left as you can go....and Bush takes a stand and says NO to aborotion and No to gay marriaged. Even kerry doesn't want gay marriage but won't do anything to stop it.
JeffyJeffW: i dont know if it's our place to legislate morality
JeffyJeffW: states have always recognized marriage
JeffyJeffW: and really, marriage is between God and christians
JeffyJeffW: i dont know if God reconizes marriages of nonchristians
JeffyJeffW: since, it is a practice for God's people
Girl: lol God says to judge by their fruit...I'm judging Kerry by what he stands for. I just think it's weird how you wouldn't be totally for Bush being a Christian. You know there is a spiritual battle going on in the world....you understand how important prayer is...you're outside of the "box" I just thought you would see how Bush is the best one
JeffyJeffW: well, i understand all of those things
JeffyJeffW: however, our vision is limited by falalibiity
JeffyJeffW: falliablity
JeffyJeffW: we're flawed
JeffyJeffW: God knows my heart
JeffyJeffW: even if I vote wrong
Girl: Yes but just pray about it OK? Vote for the one who gives you peace in your heart. And God will bless that
JeffyJeffW: haha, why wouldnt you have assumed i already have done that
Girl: well cuz u just told me you're looking up the canidates trying to figure out who to vote for
Girl: so i just gave you my advice sorry
JeffyJeffW: i never said "look to the canidate"
Girl: JeffyJeffW: looking up canidates and figureing out whom i am voting for
JeffyJeffW: haha "looking up" is a figure of speech
JeffyJeffW: like, researching
Girl: Yeah, I know
Girl: you're researching them
Girl: I know that
Girl: so I said pray about it...and it'll come to you
JeffyJeffW: haha
JeffyJeffW: acutally, before you went into your rant Girl: duh
Girl: BUSH
Girl: You're a christian right?
JeffyJeffW: i was going to say i was looking up for senate, house, and ammendments
Girl: It's just important that he wins. And it's important that all christians band together and make sure Kerry doesn't get in. 4 million christians didn't vote last election. It's time to change that. It's time to change peoples mind who think "oh my one vote dosn't count"
JeffyJeffW: ive already made up my mind
Punks, Act Your Age

I'm so tired of hearing, "...And I approved this message."

Well, here we are. There is no time left. It's officially November 2nd. I'm really excited about this election. I have been able to vote for six years now, but I haven't cared about until this year. Shoot, I didn't even register until last summer. I don't know why I started to care then, I guess it's just a part of growing up and getting old. I'm glad I did it though. I will be participating in my civic duty tomorrow afternoon. Of course, in Jeff-fashion, I won't make my way there until afternoon, haha. I ain't getting up early just to vote. Sheesh.

Okay, so here is my attempt to reach the hearts of people who might still be undecided. I am voting for George Bush. I'm willing to take my chances with four more years of him, than the ever-changing John Kerry. Bush will lead us in a way that Kerry is incapable of. You've heard all of the evidence. I won't be able to sway you. Just do what you feel is right. For me, I feel like I'm being lied to with everything I hear. I wish I didn't care, but I do. I just want to say, people should vote for the person they feel best represents their values. Don't just vote for voting sake. Vote because you believe in the person you are voting for. Don't vote republican or democrat just because that's what you're registered. Vote because you trust that candied, as much as possible.

Alright, maybe I'll have some more later today from my findings at the local voting precinct. Right now, I have to figure out some more things to decide about in my voting-mood (amendments, issues, etc). Otherwise, if I don't tell you anything else today, take this for what it's worth.

Also, for District 2, Representative in Congress, you should write me in because the canidates suck and I would be a better state Congressmen. Thanks. I'm Jeff Watkins and I approved this message...

Monday, November 01, 2004

Smokey Mountain Rain Keeps On Calling

So my paycheck didn't get directly deposited this week. It was supposed to be there on Friday, but due to a "computer glitch," I still do not have it. Hopefully, I'll get it on Monday or Tuesday.

This weekend wall all work for me and it was too bad. When we go outside for recreation, we always make the kids run four laps around the basketball court. One of them asked us if they still had to run because of the holiday. I chuckled and said yes. I thought about explaining to them what Reformation day was. I didn't though. They have a hard enough time with why they're not supposed to cuss and hit other people.

Yeah, November is here. Nice to see that. At this time, last year, I was still unemployed. Haha. *Pfft* unemployment. Speaking of jobs, I'm looking for something to do part time on my days off. I still need bunches of money for debt and school next semester.

Okay, I had more I wanted to say, but now it's gone. Until then.

"Cold October fall. The outside of a VFW Hall. I said I minded distance, but distance would define us - define us all. A tree in Nichol's Park. I carved a broken heart. I said I minded distance, but distance owned us from the very start. It's every song. There's dividing lines between east and standard time. So promise me you'll still be mine." The Get Up Kids, Central Standard Time, from Eudora.