There's not a lot I can say right now. I was glad that I didn't have classes on campus this week (now not until next Tuesday, if even then). But man, I'm seeing pictures from New Orleans and I would give back my week of freedom just to have dry land there. 80% of the city is underwater. God providentially and sovereignly watched out for me and my school, but I can't help but feel like a victim for everyone else. I am lucky, but they aren't. That's a gut-nulling feeling. I want to cry because so many people have lost everything. And it's not just material goods; it's life, liberty, hope, love, friends, etc. I wanted to post some pictures I found, but that's not really important. (You've probably seen the same ones.) Also, I have some friends who had to stay in the city and I can't get in touch with them. It's all so overwhelming and all I can do is pray. I encourage everyone to look at the TV and pray. Don't ignore this--it's not surreal--it's real life. It felt like fantasy to me early today, too. Except, that I actually live there and it happened to me. I am blessed and I am so thankful for that. But I am the exception.
A breakdown: 1. I worked at Opryland and hated it. 2. I called out twice and on the third day called the hotline to quit. 3. The next day I called Gini at Books-A-Million and we decided that I would start the next Tuesday. 4. That night I recieved a message from Mike at the Great Escape asking me to call and schedule an interview. 5. I called the next morning and scheduled an interview for earlier the same day that I would start at Books-A-Million. 6. On Saturday Donna interviewed at JC Penny's and snagged a position in women's retail. I'm proud of her. 7. This afternoon I called the Great Escape and was informed that I got the job.
Pause for excitement
8. For a multitude of reasons I will not be able to work out a notice. Now I just have to figure out how to tell the bookstore.
Reasons this is cooler: 1. I don't have to wear an apron. 2. I don't have to wear a name tag. 3. I don't have to wear a collared shirt. 4. In addition to khakis I also have the option of jeans or shorts.
Yes, there are advantages besides clothing-related ones.
5. It's always been a dream of mine to work in a record store and this is "the mid-south's leading record store and comic shop". 6. The management is admittedly and obviously lax. 7. With traffic it only takes 16 minutes to get there. Compare that to at least 45 minutes to B-A-M. 8. This will be a cute little addition to my resume. 9. If I never get hassled about not selling enough discount cards it will be too soon. 10. Because the store is cleaned in the mornings I'll never have to stay late for that. 11. Employee discount!!! 12. The "office chatter" won't be nearly as uninteresting. 13. This is a mom-n-pop operation, they have five stores but no endless chain of higher ups. 14. This is the first job I've ever interviewed for that not only did I believe I could do but that I truly believe the job was made for me. 15. I hate muzak, I prefer actual music.
While the crescent City sits in loom of the destruction that is Hurricane Katrina, I drove to my former homestead (actually Dothan, Alabama) to run from the doom. I'll be staying with my Aunt Kim and Uncle Rob. Class is cancelled until Thursday, so I'll be here for a few days. Let's hear it for epistemology and Baptist heritage! That's all I'll be reading for these upcoming days.
I don't believe in luck. However, it would appear that God has blessed me, again. If you recall, I killed the a/c jack on my old laptop, which was a hand-me-down from my Dad. I pushed in the plug from the a/c jack into the laptop. Sucked. I finally sent it home to Dad to see if our neighbor could fix it. Apparently, he could not. What does my Dad do? He goes out and buys me a brand new one. I am treated way too good. For all you hacks, this proves my street cred:
Compaq Presario M2000 AMD Moblie Sempron Processor 2800 and 256 L2 Cache (1.6 GHz) 15" XGA TFT Bright View Display Screen 40 GB Hard Drive 256 MB DDR SDRAM 54g 802.11b/g WLAN DVD/CD-RW combo drive 6-Cell Lithium-Ion battery Microsoft Windows XP Home Service Pack 2
Notice I didn't write I'm sorry. I'm sorry implies an apology will follow with the asking of forgiveness. And while I need to do that, too, I'm merely writing a post about how I am just a sorry person. Sorry being equated with wretched, horrible, rancid, et cetera (you pick a suitable synonym).
Tonight I wrote somewhere that bad things happen because human beings are selfish. But the truth of it is, I make bad things happen because I am selfish. I am. Yes, I am.
In my efforts to be a person of substance, I often try to be more than I really am. Which is, at best, so far from what I actually need to be. What am I Nothing more than some skin and bones. So, what do I want to be? I don't know. "Want" seems to be the question that would be the episode to end the season finale of my life. Answering that dilemma would be tantamount to finally kissing the girl and living happily ever after. All the concluding answers seem to resolve within that one key question. Yet, to find the answer to that quandary, my life has to be in some sort of order for a solution to be found. Solutions are like garden hoses; easy to unravel, but so hard to make them appear like they were when originally found. If I am incorrect in my question asking, no matter even if I get the beloved paramount response, my inquisitive nature has been damaged because I was not asking the right questions to begin with. The right question--though correct seems to be a relative term--would ease the tension caused in the first place. Then, when I ask the right question, I will get the right answer. There lies the solution. Whether the result I find meets with my approval or not is up to how I feel at the moment, which is to say that my attitude is the main pain causing me to experience strife. Changing my attitude will help me find comfort when I am feeling lost. The heart is deceitful and its subsequent desires are usually wicked. I need to want my heart to be right, then I will know what I need. Stop trying to be and just be me.
Strangely enough, it is that time once again for the first day of school. I've had many of these; some bad, some good. I'm hoping this first day, the start of my 17th year, will be like the memorable ones before. I'm anticipating greeting my professors and eager to show them that I am not just another kid. I've got my new school clothes, new school shoes, school supplies, and apples for my teachers all ready in tote. I can't wait for this day. It is finally here!
"As good a church, as can be found, Their doctrine is so pure and sound, One reason which I give for this, The Devil hates the Methodist. If Satan could them all destroy, The troops of hell would shout for joy; I'll pray that God would them increase And fill the world with Methodists."
Not hardcore music or that other adult thing, but something significantly life savoring for me is symbolic in the placing of three x's in a sequential order. Last night some friends and I went bowling and I bowled my first turkey ever. And I'm not even really that good.
Despite all of the peer pressure I face from friends and family to get a cell phone, I have not given in just yet. But, cell phones are good for one thing: address books. I have a hard time keeping up with numbers and addresses, so I bought me a little grey address book (a chicktionary as Blaize refers to it). So if you would like to make sure you are in this book, comment or write me an email (jeffyjeff[at]gmail[dot]com) and give me your info. Thanks.
Its nights like these That make me be appreciative for the breath I have to breathe Driving around streets that feel alone A place you never wanted to call your home Somehow, someway, it all makes sense today Now, tomorrow comes, and I don't want to forget I seem to be growing older every minute But I catch the secondhand pausing-- Have you looked at a clock Just to watch it stop Have you ever stopped to watch your life Passing moments are like a foray into the unknown I wanted to write something meaningful Like the greats before I still can't find my edge Not quite sure what I'm looking for Pity, because potential is wasted Like the youth that the young dismiss I want to find this mystery A loving romance, not just lustful imagery I'm tired and I'm ready to sleep Not for eternity, just until the afternoon For now, I'm enjoying the sunrise Like the day that starts each new eve Something special is yours to perceive Taking philosophies for more than they are meant Living your life by someone else's screenplay Too many days I have already let pass me I need to catch up and enjoy them Stop regretting what my heart won't forget Life will only give you what you let it
I was jobless. Scared. And soon to be going for broke. I was on the verge of worries realized, being called a dead beat husband and a suffering slob, and having some sort of break down.
On Monday I was hired as a sales person at the Opryland Hotel. I am set to start next Monday. I was ecstatic that this meant we could stay. I was anxious that I could not handle or would not like this job. I got myself worked up and worried virtually over nothing. I couldn't help but hope one of the others would work out first.
I became more accustomed to the notion. I knew that I would adjust well to it. And then came the loop.
I was contacted by Bonnie at the Ryman about an opportunity there. I was called by Gini at Books-A-Million about starting there.
Before I panicked about not having a job. Now I panick about how to choose.