Wish You Were Here

The title of this post, incidentally, is the title of some great songs performed by some really great bands. Pink Floyd, Alice Cooper, and The Get Up Kids are just a few of them. Even some crappy bands will write a song and name it the same as the above title. In the vain of the talented and the not-so-good bands, I aim this post to be about a guy named Justin, who I wish could stay, if just for a little bit longer.

In case you wondering, Chase inspired this little diddy. For the record, as long as I've lived in Graceville, I have known of Justin McLeod. At first, this would be friendship was nothing more than a civil acquaintance; two guys who knew each other because we had mutual friends. At some point, Justin and I started talking and we haven't quit since. Now, I suppose, we will have to stop--that is until he can at least afford internet.

J-Mack (what I used to call him) and I had an interesting beginning. I don't remember the first time I ever met him, but I do remember the first time thinking, "This guy has an unhealthy obsession with Star Wars." Kevin Eaton (2nd semester roommate) and I were in Heartdance Music store in the Dothan Mall. We recognized this semi-clean shaven (pre-full-on beard) dude that went to our college. At the register, we struck up a conversation with him. We realized we all knew each other and proceeded to share opinions on our likes and dislikes in life. Kevin and Justin could find middle ground. Justin and Jeff could not. We both, I guess out of respect, wouldn't blast the other's loves or hates. Yet, it was that first day and certainly not that last that we would hear of his disdain for hardcore and my uneasiness with George Lucas. From that 'unbonding' conversation grew an almost five year friendship that will probably never be unboundable.

While we may have disagreed on movies and music, there was always one subject we could agree on; the ladies. We loved to hate girls. A very famous drive (no doubt skipping chapel) to Chipley later on that semester became the clincher of our tenure as friends. From that time on, we have always referred to each other as best friend. There's something nice about having someone recognize you by that title. So sweet in fact, that never having a best friend again means, you had the best friend you could ever have already.

Well, here's where I get lame folks. I said that heartstring-pulling, tear jerking bit above for effect. I know, I know, I'm gay. But still, it sounded good. I will probably have another best friend before the day I die. But, the truth be told, McLeod is one of the best guys I have ever known. I have been proud to unequivocally call him my best friend for the past year, even though, it's probably the least amount of time we've hung out. Justin is the kind of guy that will forgive you when you wrong him--like that minute even. Not always the quickest with a phone call, he usually was one of the quickest people I know to lend a hand. There is something reassuring about someone's faith when you see them strive to be more like Christ everyday. Justin McLeod said to me one time, "To no longer doubt means, you are no longer thinking." So true, as I am doubting why that guy is thinking of running off to Ocala. But, I am the fool because I am the one who had doubt to begin with.

Am I mad at Justin for leaving? Sure. Am I happier for Justin than anyone could ever know? Yeah. Just like Chase said, bittersweet man, bittersweet. Is losing someone you're not afraid to be yourself around scary? Certainly. Is saying goodbye to your best friend mean that you can no longer call him your best friend? Nah. There are certainly more petty things to worry about than the current status of a friend. So, I say it loud and I say it proud: Justin McLeod, he is a one of a kind guy who happens to also be my best bud.

It's hard to end this. It might seem to be a overkill or seem trite to someone who doesn't know this guy, but it all comes from my heart. From our constant days of differing opinions, to the consistency in our friendship. From the long rides, long talks, trips to movies, malls, houses, restaurants, skipping chapel to eat at IHOP, arguing, backbiting, blogging, IMing, emailing, calling, visiting, writing, praying, hanging out, sharing tobacco or alcohol, and all the many hours pining over the opposite sex, thanks Justin--you were a good friend. And to all the future events that time holds for us to interact in, I count myself lucky. May God be your light as you shine his love on this world...

"So damn lucky, that you went on ahead. You say, you say 'I'll see you later.'" -Dave Matthews Band