White Cars

Let's say there is a girl...
More like a woman,
I don't want people to get the wrong idea.

This lady is someone,
Somebody who makes me feel good.
And that is something worth pursuing.

But my dilemma is,
She's the talk of the town
And she's stolen everyone's fancy.

What concludes me to believe
This time will be different
From Allyson, Sheila, Nikki, etc?

What makes me any different?
What makes me any thing, anyway?
Memories and bookends are all I have.

Am I worthy?
Do I compare?
Just another head in a room of faces facing the other way.

So, what gives?
I only ask questions to hear myself speak
Even when I don't want an answer.

Is there anything special about me?
Not a lot,
Less than most I would guess.

Yet there is something so mesmerizing about her;
I cannot bear
To think she would even entertain the notion of me.

I watch as interest is shown.
I see her reject and accept.
I notice how quickly my chances diminish.

There's no need for a contest,
I'll bow out before I start.
You see, I've never been one for competition.

Scores of prospects flail about
I sit on the sidelines and give advice.
Friends don't matter when romance abounds.

Commitments were scarce in my day.
Newspaper ads were more common.
I guess that's how you make your choices.

Day 5

Life is better.

Writing helps. Work helps. Hanging out with friends certainly helps. Life is okay, but my dead car (of which I need a new alternator) is a constant source of frustration, but life is alright. Sarah says I have until midnight tonight to keep mentioning this incident. Then the pity party has to end. I think I'll mention it one more time to her, just to get some of this perspective she mentioned in her last post. The thing that bothers me the most is my own mind. I question so many things. I have shrugged off a lot of criticisms and corrections in
life. Perhaps I should have listened. Now, when I don't want to listen, and actually have a real reason to be pissed, I can do neither. The mind wanders, and mine won't stop wondering. Don't worry, I have a lot of poetry that has helped me cope.

To quote Joey Ramone, a man who I am sure would befriend me, "Don't worry about me."

P.S. LSUCKS

Day Two

My heart still hurts. I should start a new blog about rejection. I've been turned down before, but this hurts. It always hurts more when real emotions are involved. As sad as this is, there are moments where I feel like randomly crying. Why do I let this bother me so much? I should be pissed. I should be so many things. But I'm not. I'm not anything. And, apparently, that's the problem.

Dear Girl I Liked That Dyes Her Hair Blonde

Stop! You give natural blondes a bad name.

Happy Christmas

I hope you have a wonderful holiday.

God Bless!

Or the Warm Tropical Beaches of the Florida Coast

Some have said that my appreciation for the state of Florida borders on obsession rather than admiration and affection. This might be true. I do love the state, and think it is one the better ones in the union.

But as I drove to Melbourne, FL from Louisiana last Thursday something funny happened. If you paid attention to the weather in the Southeast at all last week, you may have heared that a big low went through from Texas to the east coast. It rained profusely. I left New Orleans Thursday morning, and as soon as I made it to the Louisiana/Mississippi border it began to rain. Not only did it rain, it stormed. Did it just storm? No. There was 40 MPH winds, lighting, hail, everything. It was crazy. I think it was the worst storm I ever drove through (with the exception of Hurricane Ivan in 2004). At one point, I was on I-10 driving about 30 MPH! I couldn't see for hours. It was horrible. I just wanted the storm to end, for it to get quiet, and me to drive the speed limit.

Yet, as I approached the Alabama/Florida border, I experienced a relief. As soon as I crossed into the 27th state something happened. The rain stopped. Sure it sprinkled here and there. But it was like the clouds parted and there was a little light from the sun behind the many large clouds. As I crossed into Florida I thought to myself that this was significant. It stopped raining as soon as I got here. It was like God was saying, "You are home." Even if it had not been raining, once I get to Florida, things always just seem better. And maybe, just maybe, God turned the water off just so my obsession/appreciation would continue.

Maybe it's not that weird after all.

God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

Music and Lyrics: Traditional
Additional Lyrics by David Bazan

God rest ye merry gentlemen, let nothing you dismay
Remember Christ our Savior was born on Christmas Day
To save us all from Satan’s power when we were gone astray
O tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

And after Thanksgiving, our folks unpacked the manger scene
With Mary, Joseph, shepherds, and three kings on bended knee
But left the manger empty til we slept on Christmas Eve
O tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

God rest ye merry gentlemen, let nothing you dismay
Remember Christ our Savior was born on Christmas Day
To save us all from Satan’s power when we were gone astray
O tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

And now my wife and children dream of gifts beneath the tree
While I place in the manger baby Jesus figurine
Sipping Christmas whiskey wondering if I still believe
O tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

Oh Come, O Come Emmanuel

Veni, veni Emmanuel,
Captivum solve Israel,
Qui gemit in exilio
Privatus Dei Filio.
Gaude, gaude! Emmanuel
nascetur pro te, Israel.

The Cost of Living Through "The Twelve Days of Christmas"

I love Christmas, this you should already know. I enjoy the season, the cool air, and the music this time of year produces. I'm especially a fan of the song "The Twelve Days of Christmas" (which, surprisingly, Relient K does a great pop-punk cover of). CNN has recently published an article online that shows how a report by a money management firm calculates the cost of what it would be like to get all of the items listed in the aforementioned song. The total cost? $78,100! You can read the humorous article here.